Leap of faith

I am afraid. Well, that's not exactly something new. I'm more or less afraid of everything, just way too stubborn to take it in account. "Scared? GOOD! Let's do it anyway!"
That's how I made lots of things work. I was afraid. It was completely insane, but I threw myself in nonetheless, and winged things up until it worked.
I like the comfort of my safety zone. But I just can't let fear dictate my life. Not in a thousand years!
And In a month, I'm going to take a new leap of faith.
Leaving the safety of my Job in Paris, of living at my parents place, of studying something really easy, of my friends. New and old. I'll leave everything behind me and try something else on the other side of the world.
I don't really know what will happen to me afterward. I try not to think too much about it. Will I come back to France? Leave China for India, or for Iceland? I ditch the unremarkable life I had for a new life of adventure. And it's both Thrilling and Terrifying.
I've so much to do before leaving. So many people I want to see, and NOT FREAKING LEAVE BEHIND!
I mean, I know, they'll all be there when I come back (or so I hope) but still, there's a huge amount of voices in my head saying that this is INSANE.
Of course, I'll also make new friends there. But well, here at least I know who the weirdos are.
I'll have to try my best and blend in (at least long enough to make the difference between muggles and weirdos.)
I need to leave, that's not even an option. I've been preparing my departure for literally more than a year, but fuck, It's crazy.
I guess people would hit me on the head for saying that, but I literally have nightmares about ending up alone after leaving the country. I will miss all that crazy folk and probably wish I never left.
I need to go. Let's be honnest. Those last two years have been ...er... interesting? I did learn a lot about myself, grew up as a person, and had tones of fun with lovely people.
But good gracious god, I'm happy to leave my job and my business school! It's been a ordeal to put one foot in front of the other for the last two years. I got so bored! My brain felt like it was rusting in my skull. It's been draining me all year long, and I had so many breakdown I could have designed a rollercoaster after my moodswings.
At least now I know that I'm not made for working in an office.
I need to widen my horizon and to try new things. I need changes and new challenges.

I'll be back to my love for foreign languages. Back to study languages, even teaching languages! I'll learn so many things!
Chinese! (quite obviously) and Russian (there's lots of russian speaking people at the university, so it should help!) also Arabic (same than for Russian) and possibly Thai (very likely since Lea's friends are mainly thai.)
I'm seriously afraid of loosing people and filled with adrenalin just with the anticipation of so much knowledge at my disposition.
Please people, don't forget me while I'm away.
I know it's part of life, people moving, and meeting new people and only the strongest friendship survive, but I'm too afraid to lose everyone. I know people won't stop living while I'm away, and it's even a good thing. I'm happy that their life go one and get even better. I just wish that there will still be a small place for me in their life.